laugh yer ass off here....

[Spike23]

"2 Nuns"
> Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last
> instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a
> drop of paint on their habits.
>
> After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock
> the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude.
> In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door.
>
> "Who is it?", calls one of the nuns.
>
> "Blind Man," replies a voice from the other side of the door.
>
> The two nuns look at each other and shrug, and deciding that no harm
> can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door.
>
> "Nice boobs," says the man, "Where do you want the blinds?"

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?Spike?

Spike's Webpage

[email protected]

[Spike23]

Three young men and a lady were sitting at the bar talking
about their professions.

The first guy says, "I'm a YUPPIE..... you
know... Young, Urban, Professional."

The second guy says, "I'm a DINK..... you
know... Double Income, No Kids."

The third guy says, "I'm a RUB.... you know
Rich, Urban, Biker."

They turn to the woman and ask her, "What are you?"
She replies..... "I'm a WIFE ... you know,
Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc."

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?Spike?

Spike's Webpage

[email protected]

[Spike23]

A man went to a doctor to have his penis enlarged. Well, this particular procedure involved splicing a baby elephant's trunk onto the man's penis.
Overjoyed, the man went out with his best girl to a very fancy restaurant. After cocktails, the man's penis crept out of his pants, felt around the table, grabbed a hard roll and quickly disappeared under the tablecloth. The girl was startled and exclaimed, "What was that?".
Suddenly the penis came back, took another hard roll and just as quickly disappeared. The girl was silent for a moment, then finally said, "I don't believe I saw what I think I just saw... can you do that again?"
With a bit of an uncomfortable smile the man replied, "Honey, I'd like to, but I don't think my ass can take another hard roll!"

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?Spike?

Spike's Webpage

[email protected]

[Leo the Lioness]

daaaaaaaaaaaaamn!

[Myra]

*tears streaming down face* *ROTFLMFAOPIMP* wohhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooohehehehe

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Everyone thinks i am insane.... all but my friends deep inside the earth......

[Më£ïñÐa]

A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the
door of an erotic sex shop. Obviously totally unstable on her feet, she shakily hobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.
Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, she asks, "Ddddooo youuuu hhhave dddddildosss?' The assistant, politely but ernestly holding himself replies, "Yes we do many models in fact". To this, the old women asked, "Ddddooo yyyouuuu hhhave aaa bbblackk ooone tttenn inchessss lllong aandd abbouttt tttwoo iinnchesss thththiiickkk?" "Yes." "Ccccccannnnn yyyyouuuu tttellll
mmmmmeeee hhhhowwww tttttoooo tttturrrnnnn ttttheeee
fffffuucccckkkkkkingggg
ttthingggggg offfffff??!!!!

[Sniffer]

On their 25th anniversary, a husband took his wife out to dinner. Their teenage daughters said they'd have dessert waiting for them when they returned. After they got home, they saw that the dining room table was beautifully set with china, crystal and candles, and there was a note that read: "Your dessert is in the refrigerator. We are staying with friends, so go ahead and do something we wouldn't do!" "I suppose," the husband responded, "we could vacuum."

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Sniff.... Sniff.... Do I Smell a sense of humor??

[Myra]

A 100 year old man was having a big birthday party at his
nursing home. A TV crew was there to interview the man
on this special day.

"Please tell our audience how you managed to live so
long," as the reporter.

"Well, I don't ever drink and I've never smoked," replied
the old geezer. "And, I make it a point to stay away from
wild women."

Just then, there was a loud shriek in the hall. The crew
turned to see a nurse run by, followed by an agile looking,
older man. The older man carried a foul smelling cigar in
one hand and a glass of whisky in the other. As he ran by,
he paused for a moment, looked at the crowd and let out
a hardy, "He, he, he!" and then continued his pursuit.

"What was that all about?" asked the astonished reporter.

Replied the old geezer, "Please excuse my father - he gets
carried away sometimes!"


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Everyone thinks i am insane.... all but my friends deep inside the earth......

[Sniffer]

can someone please tell me why posts keep disappearing from this thread? at one point there were 26 posts here... now there are 17!

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Sniff.... Sniff.... Do I Smell a sense of humor??

[Myra]

I think mel moved spikes jokes to his own thread that is why...... i do belive

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Everyone thinks i am insane.... all but my friends deep inside the earth......